The Back-Stretcher

Today, a package came in the mail. It was huge, maybe as big as me standing up and with my arms outstretched. It was this thing called an Inversion Table. You strapped yourself to it and turned yourself upside down to stretch your back. All the blood rushes to your head, and if you stay like that for too long, your eye balls can pop with all of the pressure of the blood in your head. You stay upside down for about 3 minutes, and then slowly turn right side up. If you turn right side up to quickly, then you can pass out. I tried it for only a minute and a half, and while I was upside down, I could feel all the blood rushing to my head. Then, there was a searing pain and my eyeballs exploded inside my head. All I could see was white. People screamed, and I heard my eyeballs bounce on the floor. Just kidding 😉 After the timer rung I slowly rolled right side up, and could feel the blood slowly going back to my feet.

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Just a image from google
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Gru goes to jail

Gru was a grumpy old man. Ever since his heist at trying to steal the worlds biggest crystal, he had been serving his time in jail. And the sad part was, Gru never got the change to steal the diamond; the police knew what he was up to and met him at the bank, guarding the safeguard that contained a 3.6 million diamond. He had been escorted to jail, where he had his trail in six weeks. And now, he was cell-mates with a top-notch serial killer, who killed three butterflies, six worms, and eleven ants. Gru asked him how he had gotten in jail, and the seven year old replied that his “wooden bat had accidentely slipped out of his hand and hit the police man in the head”.

It didn’t sound like much of an accident to Gru. He told the boy he had tried to steal a 3.5 million dollar diamond, and then he ended up here. Then Gru burst into tears, bluberring about how he needed the diamond to support his family who supposedly lived on the street, and how he wanted to become a lawyer when he grew up. Gru was still blubbering about his poor family, when a guard walked in to the cell. Luckily, Seven Year Old had his wooden bat confiscated, or he would have killed the guards. One of the guards escorted Seven Year Old to the cafeteria, and the other one led Gru to the office where his lawyer waited. They talked about stuff. Ask Gru what they talked about, not me. I not in jail. After about an hour, Gru got up for lunch, ate a moldy bologna sandwhich, drank a cup of hot orange juice, and read a couple of newspapers. Then he went back to his jail cell, where Seven Year Old was hogging up the bunk-beds. There was a loud snoring sound coming from under the blanket. Gru guessed that Seven Year Old was taking a nap. Gru washed his face, and finished reading the magazine he had stolen from the magazine stand inside the jail. Then he woke up Seven Year Old and took the top bunk. Later that night, Gru heard a rumbling outside his jail-cell. He slid the blanket off and jumped down from the top bunk. Gru looked through the bars, an grinned as Bob, the yellow minion with one eye slipped out of the air vent. Bob grinned, and cheered, and his other freind, Mart, a purple crazed minion unlocked the door. Gru slipped out of the jailcell, but hesitated when he thought of Seven Year Old. Just then, Bob   jumped and down, and pointed down the hall. He looked very frightened. Gru heard distant footsteps. The Guards! They patrolled the hallway to make sure that no minions let out people from jailcells. Gru made up his mind, grabbed Seven Year Old, and escaped from the cell. They drove to Gru’s house in his rocket car, and had a party celebrating Gru’s escape from prison. And they lived happily ever after.

The Shoeless Girls

 

Once upon a time, there lived a little girl. Her name was Emily, and she was eleven years old. She had run away from her parents, because she had wanted shoes, but her parents were very mean, and told her to make her own. Emily was very mad that day, and at night, when everyone was asleep in the house, Emily jumped out of the third story window. Emily would have probably plunged to the ground, hit her head on the sharp rock that was right under the window, and died instantly. But what happened was probably a miracle. Emily fell a couple feet, and suddenly floated up! Emily was so surprised, she let out a yelp that awoken the dog, which started barking like crazy. Emily pointed forward, and she started flying in the way that she wanted! Emily pointed straight forward, and she started flying the speed of sound to who-knows-where. The dog (which was Emily’s dog) broke her chain and started trying to jump over the fence. But Emily was going way too fast to be caught. Emily hooted in happiness, to be able to fly, and to be able to get away from her mean parents. Emily Suddenly felt so tired. She hadn’t had a nap for the whole day, and didn’t know how to land! Emily tried to stop flying, but she was too tired to even lift her hand up for her to see. Emily fell asleep, still flying to who-knows-where. The next morning, Emily found herself in a dense jungle, laying in the canopy of a huge mango tree. “Where am I?” Emily wondered out loud. There were a couple of deliciously ripe fruits hanging from leaves. MMMmmm. Emily picked one off, peeling off the skin with her hands, and bit into the yellow mango. Juice ran down Emily’s mouth, and she looked like a savage. The mango was so delicious, Emily almost fainted. After a couple of second, Emily had finished the mango, and the huge seed was the only thing left. There was sticky mango juice everywhere, including Emily’s hair. Emily picked mango after mango, stuffing them in her mouth. There was a huge pile of mango seeds on the jungle floor below where Emily was sitting. Emily was so sticky, that if she put her hands together, waited a couple of seconds, and tried to pull them apart, nothing would happen, except when she would lick her hands. Emily had to get out of the forest, wash herself, and see where she was. Emily remembered how she had flown away from her house and escaped the jail-like place. Emily got up onto her shoeless feet, which was really hard since she was trying to balance on a thin mango tree branch, and jumped off of it. She pointed a little bit forward, and just before she hit the even stickier pile of mango pits, she zoomed forward, and almost hit another mango tree. She was surrounded in trees! There wasn’t even a crack where Emily could squeeze out from between the trees. The only place she could get out of the place was to fly upwards, about a couple hundred feet, and then she would be out of the mango tree place. But how would she fly up? She didn’t even know how to land on the ground! But Emily tried anyways. She jumped up, and though up all the ways to fly upwards, but Emily just fell to the ground. “Humph!” Emily was mad, even madder than the maddest person in the world of maddest persons who are mad. Emily was steamed. She tried one more time, and this time, it worked! Emily was able to fly straight up into the air, clearing the mango tree line, and straight up into a huge dense cloud. It was freezing cold, and water droplets stuck to her like glue. Then suddenly, Emily had an idea! She stuck her hands even deeper into the clouds, and got them soaking wet. She rubbed them together like she was washing her hands with soap and water, and the mango stickiness came right off. She washed her arms, shoeless feet, and hair, which stuck together in sticky clumps thanks to the mango juice. Emily flew up even higher, and the water came off of her because Emily was going so fast. She shot straight up about a mile up, and looked down below. The clouds had faded away, revealing a huge island surrounded by blackish looking water. There was some red tinge to it, which made it look like blood. The island was surrounded with mango trees, Emily could tell by the shape of the leaves, but the middle of the island was bare, except for a forest here and there, and some villages. Villages! Emily stopped thinking about floating in the air, and dropped. Emily’s hair immediately felt like it was going to rip off as she fell down a ten feet a second. She was heading straight for the black water! Emily pointed in the direction of the villages, thought of floating, and slowly started slowing down. Below her, the black water made weird waves. Suddenly, there was a huge burst of bubbles from below the surface, and a humongous shark leaped above the water, and nipped at Emily’s feet.  It fell back in the water, gravity pulling it back down, but Emily screamed in fright, and zoomed off before the shark could jump up again and swallow her completely. She zoomed right over the village, where a bunch of people where crowded around a bonfire. There was a turkey over the fire, and Emily could smell the delicious smells. There was also a basket of different types of mangos sitting in the basket. So the people did eat the mangos! Then, someone spotted her, and started yelling at the people sitting around the bonfire. They too looked up, and were amazed at the sight of Emily floating over the fire. She looked down, and saw that the people were trying to jump up to get her down from the air!

 

Emily herself didn’t know how to get down from the air. Did she have to think about wanting to touch the ground? Maybe! Emily concentrated as hard as she could, yearning to touch the ground. She even started to sweat, because the temptation to touch the ground was so much. Then suddenly, Emily started to descend! The people were jumping over each other, shouting in foreign languages, trying to reach Emily. Emily decided that landing in a tree would be better, so the people couldn’t trample her. She rose a little bit in the air, and floated off to the nearest mango tree, which was a couple yards away. Emily landed in the lowest branch, which groaned and creaked under her ninety-pound weight, but it surprisingly held. Emily dropped to the soft padded ground, and the people rushed forward to meet her. “Hello! Hi!” The people who lived here didn’t understand her language, but she used her hands to speak, and they understood her. “Yah! Yah!” Some man with huge feathers on his head shouted to the people, and they backed away, leaving Emily some space to walk forward. Some older women lead Emily to a warm hut, that had some clothes and water and food in it. Emily was hungry. No, she was starving. That flying had really exhausted her, and she wanted to sleep, eat, and sleep some more.

After Emily had got dressed and stuffed with this really delicious mango, something the women called “mango chow”. It was really good, and was a little bit spicy and salty, but Emily had depleted them off the mango chow, and the women had gone to make some more, making signs with their hands, telling Emily to take a nap. They had led Emily to another empty hut, but the floor was covered in soft straw. Emily took a nap, and by the time she had woken, it was daytime. The women were right over Emily’s head, gawking at her like crows. “Gah!!!” Emily jumped up, and accidentally flew up, and made a hole in the roof, flying above the tree canopy, and into the clouds. “Opps!” Emily though to herself. She had broken the roof of the hut! Emily flew back down, and accidentally performed a backflip. Some of the people clapped and cheered, some stomping up and down in delight, thinking Emily had done it on purpose. Emily landed back on the now broken roof of the napping house. Those ladies who were standing right over her had really spooked her! Did they not understand that? Emily jumped off of the hut roof, and landed on the soft dirt floor with a bow. The people applauded her, but the ladies walked over, and dragged Emily back to the broken roof of the hut. Emily was scared, either at the fact that she would have to fix the roof, or the stranger women would get mad at her, and kick her out of their village. But the ladies were actually smiling and grinning! The one all the way to the right started making hand gestures that look like she was dancing to a song, but what Emily translated as “We really needed that hole in the roof! It was starting to get hot in the house at night, and we couldn’t figure out how to make the hut cooler! So thank you!” Emily made up some sign language that said “Your welcome! Do you have any more mango chow?” The women laughed like that was so funny, and lead Emily out of the napping hut, and walked over to another huge hut, this time, there was no roof. There were just walls, and a frame where the roof should be.

“What is this place?” Emily forgot that the people didn’t speak English, and blurted that out loud. “You speak English!?” one of the women spun around, surprised. “Yes!” Emily was super happy that someone actually spoke English. The girl was about fifteen years old, and looked about two feet taller than Emily. “My name is Emily!” Emily said. “And my name is ____”